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Taylor Swift's New Song Sounds Like Entitled Teen Ranting On Facebook

Yeah, guys, I'm going there.

So - before I fall too deep down this hole, let me preface this story with the fact that this new Taylor Swift song will be a major hit, the concept for the music video will be well put together, and will be another crowning achievement in her career.

I, however, have some opinions. Some strong opinions...

 

PETTY AF

In wrestling, they call a good guy turning into a bad guy "a heel," and that's exactly what this song is for Taylor Swift. This is her "heel" moment. She had many before hand where she pretended to be nice and then used her "good girl" image to get away with a lot, but this song is the epitome of pettiness. Rather than finding a way to "shake it off," she basically revealed that she was really Regina George this whole time - including sampling a beat from a song USED in Mean Girls, as well as referencing The Burn Book in a very vague way.

KATY PERRY on Twitter

Watch out for the Regina George in sheep's clothing...

Remember This Fact: Taylor Swift And Adele Are The Same Age

You wouldn't know it by the immaturity of this song. This is not groundbreaking lyricism. "Look what you made me do. Look what you made me do. Look what you made me do. Look what you just made me do." The classiness of Taylor - what was left of it anyway, is gone. G-O-N-E. The overall encompassment is a slam against many different situations in which Taylor is the "angry victim," but a victim none the less. She comes SUPER CLOSE to admitting that she was in the wrong - but in the next breath, she makes sure that everyone knows that karma will come for the people who wronged her.

Louis Virtel on Twitter

Original title of "Look What You Made Me Do" was "I Don't Want to Shake It Off This Time, MOM.

Torie Lyons on Twitter

Michelle Obama: "When they go low, we go high." Taylor Swift: "Look what you made me do." #childish #TaylorSwift #LookAtWhatYouMadeMeDo

 

 

This Weird Trap Beat And Reverb Is Really Bad

You'll know it when you hear it. It starts with "The world moves on, another day another drama drama." This must have been what people were talking about when they said that Taylor was learning to do more of a hip-hop based album. She's sort of rapping/singing in this song, and this is her version of a diss tape, but it honestly falls flat on his face in terms of being dangerous, and sounds like it was made on your buddy's drum machine in his basement. Also, if these screen caps have any judgment based on what we're going to see for the video, I'm pretty sure that Taylor Swift is ripping off "Sorry" from Beyonce. #TheBeygencyKnowsNoBoundaries

BoycottNFL on Twitter

You are a joke @taylorswift13

Talk About Vindictive

Katy Perry is hosting the MTV VMAs. Where's Taylor's new video going to drop? THE MTV VMAs.  Oh, and did anyone miss the fact that her album drops on the day that Kanye West's mother Donda died? The 10th anniversary, no less. Honestly, that bit of it makes me feel disgusted I'm even giving her the time of day right now, and I'm glad I haven't purchased this track. "The Old Taylor Can't Come to The Phone Right Now. Why?" Because she's sitting around in hiding and planning all these sequential numbers/dated meanings, making her a psychotic Rainman that would star in an Ashley Judd "you-stole-my-kid-now-prepare-to-die" drama.

Taylor Swift on Twitter

Official #LWYMMDvideo world premiere. Sunday 8/27 at the @vmas https://t.co/tjAxr8qdsY

Jack Antonoff And Taylor Swift Admit To "Interpolating" Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy"

Don't worry, they gave the 90's band writing credits for the song according to NME. Which now that you've read it, that's all you'll hear in the chorus.

Right Said Fred on Twitter

Thank you @taylorswift13 ❤️ what a marvellous reinvention! #imtoosexy #lookwhatyoumademedo https://t.co/malXQ8uMQe

 

All Of The Snakes And Victim Blaming

"I don't trust nobody and nobody trusts me." This is because there's VIDEO EVIDENCE that Taylor Swift agreed to Kanye's song lyrics. She literally has nothing to shade Kim for, let alone Kanye. She tried to backpedal when "Famous" came out and said that she didn't agree to being called "That B----," and that he made her famous. But that's what the whole song was about. It's ON VIDEO guys. So all of the use of snakes after Kim Kardashian showed her receipts have become an image staple for both the lyric video, and the visuals from Joseph Kahn. And while Taylor's whole song talks about how "she's been wronged," her retaliation is a phrase that abusers use on their victims. "Look what you made me do," aka "Oh, look what you made me do - you just made me throw a tantrum." No, Taylor. You chose this.

kaye toal on Twitter

jokes aside, it is not cute/pretty disturbing that the main refrain of Villainess Taylor Swift is a line most abusers say to their victims

 

The Wiping Of Social Media

This is the "Killing Of Taylor Swift," as she wipes her entire life away. So far, HAIM is the only one that's come out to support the new single publicly. Where's your squad, Taylor? Can't they trust you? Nope, no they cannot.

HAIM on Twitter

Brb dancing around our hotel room @taylorswift13

Epilogue

After this deep dive, I've come to the conclusion that yes, Taylor Swift is dead. In terms of what she used to stand for, in terms of what she did for young girls growing up, and who she was when she dropped "Tim McGraw," all the way through. And though "Bad Blood" was her first steps into this territory of darkness as a whole, we saw Taylor Swift plummet off her golden throne into her grave. And though she's emerging and "rising from the dead," as she says, she won't be the same. No, if the CW's Arrow has taught us anything, it's that if you go into the pit, you come out someone different.

I'm a Kanye Sympathizer. And I can fully admit to this, and admit how weird that is to say, let alone accept. But when you have a problem, you have to admit it, right? Well, for a long time, I was also Team Taylor. My iTunes account is littered with her singles and albums of the past, with the very last being "Bad Blood." So believe me when I say, I tried to like this, I really did. But "Look What You Made Me Do" is just like your entitled friend on Facebook having a hissy fit because someone did her wrong. And believe me, I know, I've been that girl.

 

Listen to the track yourself and see what you think:

Taylor Swift - Look What You Made Me Do (Lyric Video)

Pre-order Taylor Swift's new album, reputation, including "Look What You Made Me Do," here: http://smarturl.it/reputationTS http://vevo.ly/aCvJPS

 

Amy Cooper is a piece of toast that is slathered in sarcasm and dad jokes.